


i took my love (take it down)

by aiienharry



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - 19th Century, Alternate Universe - Historical, Falling In Love, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Humor, Happy Ending, Historical Inaccuracy, Light Angst, M/M, Mutual Pining, Sad Louis, Strangers to Lovers, at least a little bit, sorta (love at first sight)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-31
Updated: 2019-08-31
Packaged: 2020-10-04 05:37:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,416
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20465888
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aiienharry/pseuds/aiienharry
Summary: “You know you’re crazy right?” Louis says one afternoon while they’re out on a stroll with the twins. All-day Harry had been trying to get cozy with him. He was the one who suggested that they walk to the town square together because he wanted to pick something up, and Louis was the one who made the twins tag along with them as a buffer.The annoyed look on Harry’s face as he told their parents the plan was almost enough for him to call off this whole thing and just say he was feeling ill and needed to lay down (Louis wouldn’t put passed Harry to try and nurse him back to good health which would mean being in close proximity to each other that so idea was squashed). So he watched Harry suck it up, broke the news to the twins and now here they are walking.Harry threw the leaves he’d been throwing around, at him, making them laugh. He gave Louis a funny look. “How am I crazy?" He asked, "Is it because I know what I want and I go after it.” Harry gets in Louis’ face, he can feel his heavy breathing on his lips. “Or is it something else?”





	i took my love (take it down)

**Author's Note:**

> Writing this has been such a breath of fresh air. I went in wanting one thing and came out with a completely different story + a little angst! This story was supposed to be inspired by Olivia (yes the song), and before I knew it I realized it had nothing to do with it, and I started listening to Stevie Nicks, Donna Summers, and Kate Bush instead.
> 
> I hope you all enjoy! [Here is the link the edit I made!](https://leedsau.tumblr.com/post/187401512481/i-took-my-love-take-it-down-by-aiienharry-11k)
> 
> Title from the song Landslide by Fleetwood Mac!

_ Love demands expression. It will not stay still, stay silent, be good, be modest, be seen and not heard, no. It will break out in tongues of praise, the high note that smashes the glass and spills the liquid. _

_ Written on the Body - Jeanette Winterson _

… 

If there is one thing that Louis could say about living in Summerlund (which wasn’t a very long list he might add) was that during the autumn months it was breathtaking.

From the way, the leaves turned from a bright green to a harsh yellow and then fell to the ground in a flurry of soft browns and orangish reds. The constant smell of pastries and tea wafting through the town made it feel like home even on his darkest of days.

But the one thing Louis loved the most about Summerlund, the one thing that kept him from leaving this wretched town filled with pompous men and women filling their pockets and bellies while the poor get trampled and shut out, is that fact that it’s where his mother and his siblings live. It had been too hard to let go when he was of age to leave, seeing as the death of his father all those years ago brought a lot of responsibility to sit on his shoulders. Not only was he expected to be the man of the house, but he was also in charge of getting the rent from their tenants that they lent land out, as well as keep all of his siblings in line while his mother kept all their finances in line. How could he just leave when they needed him the most?

So he stayed put, left only to complete his higher education and came tumbling back with a newfound way of the world and a crick in his neck from all those nights studying, trying to cram as much information into his brain as he can. 

So yes, as much as he would love to leave Summerlund for good, to go explore the world and quill his thirst for adventure he tapped it down, he had obligations here and he would not leave until it was fulfilled. He had to make sure his family would be all right when he left, that no one would come and try to eradicate all the things they worked hard for.

Right now he was taking a little stroll through the town square after sitting in for a meeting that his mother could not make in time, trying to keep his mind on himself and wondering eyes on the road ahead of him, not wanting to become the object of everyone's petty rumors they like to gossip about over luncheon and tea. No Louis will not have that, he’s already been the subject of nasty rumors and does not need more spread every time he passes or takes a short glance, in passing, of course, at another man. 

But he also does not want to seem skittish so he squares his shoulders, balls up his fist and tilts his head high and steadily walks back to the manor. It only takes him a stone’s throw away to reach the lush pastures where his childhood home sits. The manor looming over everything would seem a bit intimidating to most but it brings Louis that all familiar feeling of home as he trudged up the stairs, coming into the foyer. 

As soon as he steps inside he’s almost knocked down by a servant carrying a vase full of flowers. Louis helps steady her and waves off all of her apologies. “No problem at all, love.”

The more he makes his way around the manor the more everyone seems to be in a frenzy, the gardener is instruction some men with quick shouts with a tone menacing enough to make a grown man cower and at least a dozen maids almost knocked him and themselves down carrying around sheets and blankets stacked so high they could barely see. 

_ Weird_, Louis thinks to himself, but there is also a sort of frenzy energy around at all times so he doesn’t worry too much about it. Determined to find a familiar face and put a name to all this madness Louis heads to the drawing-room, where he found Charlotte was sitting. 

She was talking to a boy in hushed tones, giggling and batting her eyes, hand on his shoulder while her other fanned her face. The boy, Thomas, Louis had recognized from his golden locks and big brown eyes and the fact that he’s known him since he was in a nappy and _ also _ the fact that he and Charlotte were betrothed.

Louis rolled his eyes, walking over towards them he smiled when their gazes raised to meet his. “So will anyone be brave enough to tell me what the hell is going on around here?” He inquired, the yappy dog his mother got a year ago as a birthday present for one of the girls yawned next to Thomas, pink bow wrapped around his neck and mouth wrapped around a bone. His eyes bore into Louis’ as he gnawed on the thing.

Charlotte giggled behind her hand, “I would say but mother says she will be the one to let you know. She’s in the kitchen right now,”

Louis sighed, turning around and ignoring the laughter that followed his way out of the drawing-room going through the foyer and into the kitchen. His mother was making her unwavering presence around the kitchen known, barking out orders (in soft and gentle voice of course) and holding a rather larger pot in her hands, water spilling over the edges while a servant tried his best to take it away from her, succeeding after a little coaxing that everything will be all right.

When her eyes landed on him he waved, eyes wide and wandering around the room. “Hello,” He said amused, “Are you going to tell me what the bloody hell is happening around here?”

With a happy looked turned cold in a second, in a step or two she walked over to pinch his shoulders. “Be respectful like I raised you to be and watch your mouth! And- oh! Patricia, please make sure that the bread is all ready for tomorrow. Remember last time when-” And just like that she was back to scurrying around the kitchen and Louis has just had enough of all this buffoonery.

He groaned, “_Mother_,”

She twirled around, glaring at him with her hands on her hips. “What is it? As you can see I’m very busy here, don’t be rude.”

“I’m not trying to be rude, I'm trying to figure out what the hell is going on around here. Why is everyone in a panic? Why are you terrorizing the servants?”

Once again she ignores his questions. “Terrorizing? I’m not terrorizing anyone I’m trying to make sure the manor is ready!

Louis throws his hands in the air, societal rules on how one conducts themselves be damned. “Ready for what mother?!”

“For guest!” She shouts back, tasting something a pot before turning her attention back to Louis who feels quite bewildered.

Louis frowned, well that explained all the running around everyone was doing and those servants walking around with bedding so high he couldn’t even see the tops of their heads.

He opened and closed his mouth for a bit before sighing. “Well, when did you conduct this?”

“At the start of summer I invited an old family friend to come stay for the summer, and they, unfortunately, had to decline. Their daughter was getting married and it just wasn’t timing. Sending letters back and forth throughout summer we decided that autumn would be a good time to come and visit. Are we done with all the questions?”

Louis puckered his lips, matching his mother and putting his hands on his slender waist. “Well…I have no more questions it seems.”

She shook her head, “Can you please get out of the kitchen and go check on the children for me? Charlotte and that boy Thomas have been alone far too long, they keep sending the maid out of the room so they remain unchaperoned.” 

Much to his dismay, Louis left and walked back over to the drawing-room and back towards Thomas and Charlotte. “Mum told me what all the fuss is about. Do you know anything more about it? Who is coming, anyway?”

Charlotte huffed, obviously annoyed that Louis kept ruining her alone time with Thomas. “I know as much as you do. Why didn’t you ask mum yourself.”

“Because she’s too busy terrorizing the servants to answer my question and I know you know a lot more than you let on. They say the walls have ears but I know they have next to nothing on you miss Lottie.”

She fixes him a look. “Don’t call me that. All I know is that some old friends of mum and their son is coming. Do I know who? No. Now can you please leave?”

Louis rolled his eyes, what’s with everyone not enjoying his presence around here? He knows he’s a delight to be around, must be the crazed energy around the manor that has everyone acting so strange. 

He sighed, “Before I go will you tell me when they are expected to arrive so I can be as far away from here as possible?”

“Afternoon before the luncheon, now go, _ please _.” Ah, Charlotte always a joy to be around. Louis twirled on his heels and sent one of the maids down to chaperon them, giving her instructions to not leave that room no matter what and went to go check on the children. After he found the twins to be all right, in their room reading, he headed to the gardens to finds some sanctuary and take a small breather before dinner.

It wasn’t like Louis hated having guest around, on the contrary, he loved when friends of the family would stop by for a quick dinner and be on their way by morn. Just last season his uncle Micheal stopped by, bringing presents with him and even gifted Louis a nice pocket watch that used to be his grandfathers. But he hated the way the inner workings of the manor came to a halt whenever guests would stop by for some time. Suddenly he was expected to stay around more, be a gracious host with his mother and keep up a riveting conversation while trying to pretend he wasn’t being bored to death. And as much as he flourishes being around people it was as if by the end of the day, he’d grow irritable and tiresome, snapping at the littlest things and much to his mother's dismay retiring to bed early. 

And as Louis laid his head down on his pillow that night he didn’t expect the arrival of their guests tomorrow to be any different. He frowned at the thought.

_____________________

A little after sunrise Louis was up and out of the manor, bidding his mother farewell with a promise to make his way back when the guests arrived, a promise that he did not plan on keeping. As soon as his foot touched the ground outside, the soft winds started blowing, the sun shining down on him with not a cloud in the sky. It both making him shiver and warming him up at the same time he knew it was going to be a good day. A book he had recommended to him from a friend that he had imported from London called Pride and Prejudice, had finally arrived this morning before he left. Wrapped in thick twine tucked under his arms, he made his way south of the manor away from the town square and into the lush open fields. 

The sounds of nature coddled him as he made his way to a secret spot he’d found during his younger years which has yet to be discovered by anyone else. It was an old man-made pond from how every many years ago that was only a few meters high, barely licking at his calves whenever he’d climb in to cool off. It was surrounded by various bushes and all different kinds of flowers and the bottom of the pond were covered in smooth rocks and on one occasion he’d managed to spot a phallic-looking rock that had him tumbling over in hysterics.

So as Louis made his way to the pond his mind started to wonder about how his mother was handling the arrival of their guests. He’d check his pocket watch and saw that it was a quarter to midday, which is when they’d usually have a luncheon, and if Charlotte was correct, would be the time they’d start to arrive. Usually, he was expected to help greet them and show them around the manor and to their rooms, then accompany them to the parlor for a nice social gathering. _Usually_, Louis would play the act of a gracious socially host, but today he’s decided against it, walking past a line of trees and to the hidden pond where he sits down beside it. 

It’s when he looks out at the countryside, deer running about and the occasional rabbit or bird that tries to sit or hover next to him, that Louis realizes he’s made a wonderful choice. Breathing in all the fresh air and starting the first chapter of the novel with his head on the soft bushy grass and one leg prompt up, he smiles.

He’ll have to face his mother's wrath later on tonight but to hell with it.

He hummed to himself, singing a familiar tune he’d heard one of the twins singing a few days ago, a tune that has lodged itself into his brain and won’t leave no matter what he does. And because he’s so focused on the book (which is a damn good book he must say) he doesn’t notice the little droplets of rainfall before it was too late, and a big glob of it splattered onto his nose and on the page he was reading, smudging the ink so the _ Mr _ in Mr. Darcy was all misconstrued. 

In a flash, he hopped up, past the pond and through the tree line to head for the main road. With no time to spare or he and the book would be completely soaked (he’d tried to keep his hopes up but he’d dropped the damn thing too many times), he ran all the way home. His lungs felt like they were collapsing by the time he made it to the front door, thundering clapping and sizzling all around him, dark clouds that weren’t there this morning were tumbling in rapidly, the sky turning into gunmetal and the smell in the air of rain instead of pine. 

With the rain coming down more furiously, and the fact that the bloody front door was locked and no matter how much he pounded on it and the knocker no one came to let him in. With nothing left to do, and the kitchen door locked as well, he was forced to go in through the balcony on the parlor room. At this point Louis was fuming a little, stomping through the grass and trampling on a few flowers just to make himself feel a little better. He hoisted himself up on the railing and fell onto the floor, getting up with barely any of his dignity intact, bypassing all the chairs and the table he opened the door and stepped through, coming face to face with all the guest and his family. 

All eyes were on him as he huffed and puffed, the book tumbled out of his hands and onto the floor.

His mother was up in an instant, “Oh heavens!” she yelled, the ruching of her dress the most prominent sound in the room besides all the giggling that seemed to follow him everywhere he looked. She came up to him and pushed the hair matted down on his forehead out of the way. “Are you all right love?” she asked.

Louis just smiled, although it was a fake one. “Just peachy.” He turned his attention to the three strangers sitting on one of the couches. Faltering a second when he saw the younger man wedged between them. The woman to his right must be his mother considering they look to be the spitting image of each other. And the man must be his father. “Um…sorry we had to meet this way.” He cursed himself mentally,_ get a grip_. Walking over towards them, ignoring the way his shoes squelch with each step he took, he held his hand out and shook their hands. “I’m Louis, Johannah’s son. Sorry, I’m so…wet.” He tried to laugh but it came out more force than anything. “Didn’t know it was going to rain today. My apologies, again.” Louis stood up and tried to ignore the children’s laughter in the back as he dripped all over the floor (thank God they were wood). 

“No need to apologize.”

Louis’ head snapped over to the boy sitting between his parents. His voice is what shocked Louis the most, rich and slow like molasses. Like honey dripped off the comb. The mop of chestnut curls of his head almost obscured his eyes, but Louis could tell from the few meters that he was away from them that they were a deep green color. Perfect against his porcelain skin and pouty red lips quirked as if he was smirking at Louis. His white shirt billowed around him as if it was a few sizes too big, tucked in black trousers and if Louis wasn’t already confused the boys shirt had a high neckline, which would not have been an issue since it is quite normal but at the end it sort of flares and his sleeves almost draped across his hands. He also wasn’t even wearing a coat. The boy stood, toe to toe with Louis and smiled. He felt himself flush and told himself that ogling men, much less a guest of his mother, would only get him in even more trouble. They shook hands again, this time when Louis went to pull away from the boy, his fingers lingered on his palm before pulling back. 

Louis cleared his throat, “Oh um…sorry?” He looked around the room looking at where the twins were giggling and making silly faces at him before turning his attention back to his mother and her guest. “I uhh…I will be back down shortly once I am properly dressed and have composed myself.” 

Louis spun on his heels and ducked out of the room, letting out a breath he didn’t know he was holding in. Whomever that boy was he smelled of trouble, and Louis would not be apart of it. He’s already got enough on his plate to deal with.

_____________________

The rest of the day went well, and since Louis had been gone all morning Charlotte had been expected to pick up his slack (which he got an earful of when everyone retreated to their bedchambers later that night). Right now she was showing that boy around the garden now that the rain had ceased. Gone the rolling thunder clouds and rain pelting down on you like bullets, make way for clear blue skies and perfect fluffy clouds that hide the sun's warmth like a thin veil. Louis curses and moves on, annoyed at how the weather suddenly changed back.

Now the small party had been moved to the sunroom, small pastries and tea had been sat out. His mother and the Styles, as Louis found out, were talking about their daughter's wedding while Louis could barely hold his head up from how bored he was of this already. He partially misses when Mr. Hamilton used to visit, at least he knew how to make a conversation fun with all the vulgarities he’d spit out every second.

“And you, Louis.” Des Styles turned to him, he’d looked as if he had been smelling something particularly foul. 

Louis sat up in his chair, wiping a hand across his beard he smiled. “Yes?”

“When are you getting married? How old are you?” Such invasion questions from a man who looked as if any second the buttons on his coat were going to pop at any moment. Des and Anne looked at him expectantly. His mother mouthed _ sorry._

Louis rolled his eyes. “I’m twenty-four years old sir. And the women that I was betrothed to fell in love with another.”

Anne shook her head and waved her peacock feathered fan, “Oh, that is just too bad. That happened to one of Des’s cousins! Isn’t that right, Des?”

Des nods, “Yes, the boy had run away to be with some whore from London. An absolute disgrace that was. Thank god Harry’s borrowed hasn’t taken off to do God knows what with God knows who! You know I-.”

Louis frowned, “Harry?”

His mother turned to him and smiled. “Their son, Harry. The one you met today.” Louis nodded at the information, looking out to the garden and watching Harry and Charlotte sit by the fountain laughing. 

Later on, they all sat down for supper, which Louis wanted to skip but he knew his mother would have his head if he even had the thought, so he sucked it up and made sure his glass was always filled to the brim with wine. 

Harry and Charlotte had been talking and laughing throughout dinner, which shouldn’t annoy Louis as much as it does, but he doesn’t know this Harry fellow. What if he’s filling Charlotte’s head with nonsense? He’d found out that the boy had just completed his studies in London, a passing comment made by his father that had the boy whispering something into Charlotte’s ear and throwing them both into a fit of laughter. Louis frowned, taking a sip from his glass before resuming his glare at them from across the dinner table. His food temporarily forgotten. 

For a split second, Harry looked over at him, the first time he’d done so all night. A sly syrupy smile on his face. Louis held his gaze, watching him take a sip from his glass, lips stained red from the wine. Louis’ trousers suddenly got tighter as he took a breath and did the same, tilting his glass as if to say_ hello, I see you _before taking a sip. His gaze falters when Des let out a hearty laugh, grabbing onto the table and shaking it.

When he looked back over, Harry had turned his attention back to Charlotte to resume whatever they were talking about.

Louis gritted his teeth and stabbed his now cold chicken.

Later on, they all retired to the parlor room, the twins were sent to bed, and Louis was just about to excuse himself, just about done with it all, when Harry decided that Louis’ attention was all he wanted now. Louis snorted.

“Something wrong, Lewis?” He said. Charlotte laughed before her joy was cut short and she was being sent to bed.

Louis watched her leave, before turning back to Harry. “My name is, Louis. _ Lou-ee_, it’s not that hard, I promise you.”

“Lottie told me that your name was Lewis. My apologies them, Lou-ee.” Harry said, pronouncing every syllable. And if Louis weren’t so annoyed by everyone and everything he would have maybe blushed a little, maybe would have thought he liked the sound of his name as it dripped off Harry’s tongue. 

Louis laughed, “Does she know you're calling her Lottie?”

“Well, seeing as she said she preferred to be called that I would think so.” Louis frowned, Charlotte hated when he called her Lottie. But to be far when he did it was always in jest. “Anyways, enough about Lottie.” Harry leaned in closer, his thigh closed the little distance between their legs and soon Harry was all too close to him. “I’d like to know more about her handsome brother.”

And because Louis always manages to embarrass himself, he chokes, _ yes chokes_, on his tongue. Harry immediately springs into action, patting his back and rubbing it even after Louis’ okay.

“You all right son?” Des asked from his place across from them.

Louis nodded, gave him a tight-lipped smile. “Yes, sir. Just uh…choked on some water. Must have drunk too fast.”

Anne pouted her lips, “Well thank God Harry was there to help. He always loves to help. Don’t you Harry?” 

Harry smiled at them all, his hand inching lower and lower until his fingernails were scratching Louis’ lower back. “Yes, thank god right Louis?”

Louis coughed again, sitting up and waving them off when they all stood with him. “Yes, well uhh…I think I’m going to retire for the night.” He turned towards Des and Anne. “It was a pleasure but I’m a bit tired so I’ll be heading to my room now.”

“I think I will retire as well,” Harry said.

Louis cursed him in his head, with his stupid curls that looked all too perfect and soft at the touch and dimply smile.

They both walked out of the room and into the foyer, up the stairs. Right before Louis turned to his right to head towards his room Harry tapped his shoulder. When Louis turned Harry was smiling and holding out his hand. Louis, with all his might, took it and grabbed it hard. Harry winced but didn’t falter. “It was a real pleasure, Louis.”

“Yes, something like that.” Louis turned and practically stomped down the hallway.

“Hopefully we can talk more alone tomorrow.” 

Louis stopped dead in his tracks, he had half a mind to ask Harry what was his problem, what was he playing at, and why was he doing it with Louis, but he squared his shoulders and walked to his room, collapse on his bed and groaning.

“What the bloody hell was that?” Louis says to no one but himself.

_____________________

If Louis could describe Harry in one world it would be an enigma. Something so puzzling, something so mysterious that you can’t help with wanting to find out what it was. 

Since their last meeting a few days ago, Louis can’t help but be curious as to who this Harry fellow was and what was his deal. Why he has the girls wrapped around his finger, and why everyone seems to be so smitten with him without so much as a glance in their direction. It took Louis a while to warm up to the boy, but once he had he couldn’t get enough. Harry was like a drug, something you’d do anything to get.

It was only natural that Harry can’t seem to leave Louis be.

Like now, as they walk through the pastures next to the stable. Here Harry is, in his billowing shirt, not saying anything just smiling. Sometimes Louis catches him stealing little glances at him, but he doesn’t say anything about it. But he just has to know, “What is it that has you walking through the pastures with me, Styles?” Louis has taken to calling him by his last name just to annoy the boy a little.

Harry gaffs, “Please call me, Harry. And it has nothing to do with you, Lewis. I just wanted to walk through the fields.”

Louis hums, not believing a word he’s saying, watching as a soft blush rises to his cheeks. “Oh really huh? Just wanted to take a stroll through the pastures while I also decided to do the same thing.”

Harry bits his lip like he’s holding back laughter. “Well yes. Not everything is about you, _ Lewis_. And you being here is just a coincidence.”

“You mean like yesterday when I had business to do in town, that it was merely a coincidence that I found you sitting at the fountain chatting with some bloke outside the building I was in?” Louis knows he’s not going to get the answer he’s looking for, knows that Harry is playing with him. But what Harry doesn’t know is that Louis is winning his little chess game.

Harry was biting his lip so hard Louis was afraid he was going to bite through his lips. “Yes, anyone can go into town Louis without making it about you.” Not a second later Harry picks up a flower and tucks it behind Louis’ ear. And not a second later he says, “Has anyone ever told you how pretty your eyes are?”

Louis shook his head and laughed, bemused by the boys' insistent need to try and charm Louis. Just yesterday he said to a bewildered Louis, “There must be thousands of poems and sonnets written for you, and if there isn’t there ought to be millions written from just the way you walk.”

Louis didn’t know what to say to that, just carried on what he was doing in the library and trying his best to ignore the way Harry’s foot crept slowly over his.

Louis stepped on a flower. “You know you’re ridiculous right?”

Harry finally let go of the hold he had of his lips, settling for a toothy grin. “I think I’m quite the opposite actually.”

“Oh really?”

Harry snorted, “Yes_ oh really. _So tell me some things about yourself.”

Louis hummed, “What is there to say about me? I’m a boring man from Summerlund who likes to read and take walks.”

Harry stopped walking, looking Louis square in the eyes. “You boring? You really think you’re boring?” 

Louis didn’t say anything, didn’t know what to say really.

Harry licked his lips and turn towards the herd. “You’re the most interesting person here. The day we met when you walked in with your soaked copy of Pride and Prejudice it was the most interesting thing that’s happened so far in my life.”

“Your life can’t be that boring for me to be the most interesting thing.”

“Can’t you see Louis,” Harry says, “Nothing in my life has been this fascinating since you stumbled into it. That’s what it is about you that I can’t leave alone. Without you, my life will go back to the same old boring ways it’s always been. Trying to please my parents will simultaneously try to be me.”

And with all the knowledge Louis’s learned in all his twenty-four years of life, twenty-four years of running around trying to please the world while carving out space for himself, he says. “You’ll just run yourself ragged trying to please everyone while trying to be yourself.”

Harry looks over at him, smiles softly, “Why not try even knowing you’ll fail?”

They walked for a few more minutes in silence, Harry with his not so sneaky glances at Louis and Louis trying his hardest to get under Harry’s skin. But to no avail, the boy wouldn’t break. 

A baby cow came up to them, Harry petting him a few good times before it ran away back to its mother. “It must be so nice living out here.” Harry sighed, looking out at the land.

“I loved it when I was growing up but now I’ve grown tired of it.”

Harry whipped his head around and stared at him, “How could you ever tire of this? The beautiful scenery, all this land? How?”

“It’s very easy actually,” Louis shrugged. “You grow up here your entire life and you start to tire of it.”

“Just like that?”

Louis nods solemnly, “Just like that.”

Harry turns his gaze back to the manor and lets out a long whistle. “I could never be tired of this.”

Louis shrugs, _ to each their own_, he thinks and he starts to head back. The sun setting in the horizon which means it’s almost time for the supper bell to go off right at sundown. Harry grabs his shoulder and spins him around. The reddish glow of the sun igniting ablaze in his eyes. “Let’s watch the sunset together.”

And as they stand there, shoulder to shoulder, Louis gets that all too familiar feeling that he should run, far away from whatever this is and don’t look back. But he holds on tight, steadies his feet and tilts his head up to feel the last of the warmth from the sun, trying his damndest to not turn to look at where Harry is staring at him. He closes his eyes to fight the temptation, only opens them when the warmth is gone and the sun has fully set.

They head back, trudging through the field and making it to the back where the opening to the kitchen is. Before they go in Harry hugs him. A soul-crushing hug that holds more weight to it then Louis knows, but he feels it in the way that Harry’s arms wrap around his neck, the way he feels his breath tickle his neck, the faint ghost of his lips so close to his ear lobe has him shivering. And all the ways Harry puts himself in this hug Louis does it back. Scratches the lower part of Harry’s back to make him shiver, wrapping his arms around his middle and tucking his chin and his shoulders breathing in his earthy scent. Like cedar and vanilla.

They pull apart at the sound of one of the maids throwing out a bucket of water. She doesn’t catch them but the way it felt to have almost been caught weights heavy between them. Harry scratches awkwardly behind his ear, smiling at Louis and bumping shoulders before heading inside. Louis waits a moment to look up at the sky, begging him to give him a sign, to put his mind at ease while simultaneously wanting all of his questions answered. He watches the twinkling stars before heading in.

_____________________

The days drag on, and it seemed that with each passing hour Harry would spend all of his time with Louis. And if Louis weren’t such a coward he’d say something about it, let him know that he _knows _ and that it can’t be any more than what they have now. Louis has to take control of this situation, and if he has to play the bad guy then so be it.

So whenever Harry reaches for him, tries to take his hand or gives him a peck on the cheek ("_It’s what the french do! I learned when I studied abroad, Lou-ee"_) Louis gracefully dodges it, tries to feign some excuse as to why he keeps avoiding his touches, says it’s just nerves, maybe looks down at his shoes to be a little more convincing.

But each time Harry just smiles and nods, bumps his shoulder and clenches his jaw, sometimes he’ll say something ridiculous so that the silence doesn’t eat them whole. It’s a steady cat and mouse game that Louis knows will end in someone getting hurt but he plays anyway, with a strategy that leaves them both wanting more. 

“You know you’re crazy right?” Louis says one afternoon while they’re out on a stroll with the twins. All-day Harry had been trying to get cozy with him. He was the one who suggested that they walk to the town square together because he wanted to pick something up, and Louis was the one who made the twins tag along with them as a buffer.

The annoyed look on Harry’s face as he told their parents the plan was almost enough for him to call off this whole thing and just say he was feeling ill and needed to lay down (Louis wouldn’t put passed Harry to try and nurse him back to good health which would mean being in close proximity to each other that so idea was squashed). So he watched Harry suck it up, broke the news to the twins and now here they are walking.

Harry threw the leaves he’d been throwing around, at him, making them laugh. He gave Louis a funny look. “How am I crazy?" He asked, "Is it because I know what I want and I go after it?” Harry gets in Louis’ face, he can feel his heavy breathing on his lips. “Or is it something else?”

Louis held his breath, watching as the girls skipped ahead. “I,” he paused. “You know why.”

Harry frowned, looked down at his shoes and fiddled with the sleeves on his coat. It was black, with blue accents, and it was the first time since he’d arrived that Louis had seen him properly dressed up (as per the demand by his father). Louis looked away quickly when Harry quirked an eyebrow at him.

“You know, I read this book once, and it was about these two lovers.”

Louis sighed, watching as the twins start to take an interest in them again. “Harry-”

“And the two lovers wanted so badly to be with one another but they were promised to other people and in the end, they never got together.”

Daisy groaned, “That’s a sad story, Harry. Tell a happier one.”

Harry obliged, “I’m not done with the story yet, Miss Daisy. Anyways, even though the two lovers never ended up with each other, going on to marry their betrothed, their lives still revolved around each other whether they knew it or not. So one day something miraculous happens, and they end up…they end up at the same place at the same time, and all these feelings started to pop up again and for one of them it’s all too much,” He looks at Louis as he says it. Louis has lost the game, has bared all his pieces and put up a good fight. Harry looks away, “And he just leaves, starts to withdraw himself because he doesn’t want to get hurt. What he doesn’t know is that while he’s hurting so his…so is the woman. She doesn’t understand why they seem so close yet like strangers at the same time.”

Phoebe grabs onto Harry’s arm and for a second he starts spinning her around. “Is it because…is it because he’s scared to say how he feels _and _he doesn’t want to get hurt?” she says, not knowing how close to home this story is. 

Harry lets go of Phoebe and smiles sadly, “Yes, Miss Phoebe. He doesn’t want to get hurt and he’s scared. So eventually the woman confronts him and they tell their feelings but they still don’t end up with each other.”

Louis takes a chance, asks, “Why?” 

Harry shrugged, “They’re married to other people and who even knows if it will last.”

It’s like a punch in the gut when he says it, but Louis needed to hear it.

The twins groan, “That’s still a sad story Harry.”

“Well,” He says, “It’s the truth, it’s the reality people live in.”

Daisy pulls Phoebe along, twisting back to say, “Well I like fairytale novels, not reality. In fairytales, it works out no matter what.”

They stay silent on the rest of the short walk to the town square. Harry gets what he needs and gives the girls a coin each to make a wish at the fountain, giving Louis one as well, telling him to make it count. Louis feels an electric shock go down his spine when their hand's touch as the coin is placed in his hand, his fingers linger before he goes to where the girls are. Louis stares down at the coin, the weight it has in the middle of his palm and kisses it before tossing it. 

They don’t speak for the rest of the week.

_____________________

What was said on their walk with the twins weighs heavily between them for days. They’re more distance with each other, Harry starts to spend more time with Charlotte and Louis holes himself in the library, or the study when he wants to be alone. Their talks are not the same anymore, it’s like strangers meeting for the first time, not knowing what to say, hoping that the other will pick up the slack.

For days, it's like a dark cloud had fallen over the both of them. Louis hadn’t been able to sleep throughout the night, and finally, after a stroke of luck, he was able to get a good night's rest. The previous week bringing in solace and a need for change. His mother was taking the Styles and the children to the town square and Louis had been given the option to stay, which he gratefully too (and because he’d rather be tortured than to go to the town square again). Louis has the whole manor to himself, and of course, he does not plan on staying in this dreadful place, in fact, he’s taking another walk to the pond again. Hopefully, he won't be rudely interrupted by sheets of rain anymore.

Breakfast was a pleasantly quiet affair, Harry’s focus was on Lottie and the twins were practically falling asleep at the table. After breakfast, Louis waved them off and headed to the stables to take one of the horses with him just in case a repeat of yesterday was to happen. A hard choice but he decide to take Adelaide.

Louis says hello to the stablehand and together, armed with a bag of apples, Adelaide takes off in a trot down the road south from the manor. They ride past the pond and into the field, Louis deciding to give her a break and they take shelter under a brush of trees. He feeds her an apple and takes one for himself. The cicadas buzz quietly through the field and just like that Louis is back to remembering how it was before Harry came into his life. Finally getting a chance to breathe without the boy breathing down his neck.

A sort of calm energy washes over him, he ceases to think about Harry and his stupid pretty wine-stained smile and the way he blushes whenever Louis would sometimes catch him staring. Or the way he had to adjust himself this morning when Harry’s knuckles brushed the lower part of his back, like a reminder of what happened all those weeks ago, as if Louis could ever forget. Nope! He forgets it all, it ceases to exist in his mind.

They hide under the shade for some time, walking to the pond a few minutes later and walking around inside to cool himself off. The coldness of it starts to seep into his bones that has him getting out the second he starts to tremble. Heading back to a shaded area and looking out at the fields, he spots a herd of horses running in the distance. Louis wishes he were one of them.

After a while, the bugs start to get to him, and the fact that on two separate occasions a bird almost pooped in his hair and a completely different one almost pecked out his eyes after he was messing about and swatted at its nest.

“Come on, Adelaide. Let’s get you back home.” It was near luncheon anyways, so they should be back before his mother sends out a search party. As per stipulation, and because she says he needs not to be rude while their guest stays for the rest of the month, that he has all morning to do whatever he would please but he has to be home before they have their luncheon.

So Louis begins the slow trek back, his coat thrown over Adelaide’s back, trousers pulled up to his calves and boots in one of Adelaide’s saddles. In one hand he has her apples and the lead, realizing, he makes the mistake of not getting on Adelaide back at the field because now she seems pretty content on letting him walk beside her. With the sun beating down on them Louis has half a mind to run back so she can get some water and then they can just trot back. But they’ve already made it this far. 

A constant slow crunching noise has him whipping his head around every which way until he sees it. Or rather _ him_.

There Harry is, coming out of a brush of bushes with his stupid frilly shirt hanging off his frame. Curls falling into his eyes and that dimply smile on his face. Louis drinks him in before he composes himself, spitting out. “What the hell are you doing here?”

Harry stands in front of him, tapping his boots against the ground and holding his arms behind his back. He whistles, “Just taking in all the scenery. It’s really beautiful out here isn’t it.”

Louis has no words, mouth gaping open and close like a fish before he narrows his eyes. “My mother sent you to get me didn’t she.”

Harry stops whistling and glances at him, purses his lips before shaking his head. “No, she told me you would most likely be coming from this way. So while they are all sat in the parlor waiting for you I decided I’d come to see what’s all the fuss about. What has you leaving so quickly in the mornings.”

Louis rolls his eyes, not being able to stand the heat and not wanting Adelaide’s feet to contract blisters he brings her to a shaded area. “You could have gotten yourself lost you know?”

“And yet I haven’t. My mind is like a compass,”

“Oh yeah,” Louis says, not believing a word that comes out of his mouth.

“It always points to home,”

Louis snorts, shaking his head at this man. This man who came into his life and seems to be smitten with him from their first meeting. “And where would that be exactly?”

Harry shrugged, looking at him with something unreadable in his eyes. “I don’t know yet. But when I find out I’ll tell you.”

Louis hums, kicking a little rock into a berry bush. They spend a few minutes out here on the side of the road. With Harry taking an interest in Adelaide and petting her mane, whispering to her. The awkwardness that had been following them for says seemed vacant now. With a thought, Louis could see them being friends again, go back to the way things used to be.

“Why did you name her Adelaide?” He’d ask, leaning his head so he was looking directly in her eyes.

Louis laughs at the memory. “Because I have an aunt named Adelaide and she sort of has a horse face.” He pointed to her, “So you can see where I got the name from.”

Harry let out a giant burst of laughter, a monster of a thing that was so loud and proud that he had Louis laughing alone with him. Afterward, Harry pouted, scratching her neck softly. “Well, that’s quite mean of you,” 

Louis shrugs, “Well she was a mean person so…” Louis takes a look at his watch and realizes that they are late for luncheon. “Fuck, my mother is going to have my head if I don’t get back soon.” Louis decides that it would just be faster to ride Adelaide to the manor. “Come on and hop up, I have to get us back before my mother plans my demise.” They get on Adelaide’s back and trot back to the manor, and the entire way their Harry kept his boney chin on Louis’ shoulder and his arms wrapped around his middle. It was so intimate, and Louis was just a bit tired (an excuse really) that he leaned back into it. Trying to keep his heartbeat steady with Harry breathing on his neck was the hardest part of the journey home, and when he felt a soft kiss placed at the point where his jaw and neck met, he’d almost jumped out of his skin. The way he kept his hands wound tightly around Louis’ middle jolted something within him. It frightened him. At that point he realized that they couldn’t go back to how things were, Harry’s feelings were clear now, but Louis didn’t stand in the same circle as him.

When they reached the manor he shook Harry off of him and got down safely, waiting for Harry to get off before taking Adelaide back to the stables. 

Harry trailed behind him, trying to keep up with his fast pace. “What’s wrong?”

Louis ignored him in favor of handing Adelaide over to the stablehand. “We only trotted back home and she ate three apples.” His voice was shaky, and so was his hands as he handed over the satchel of apples. He watched as she was lead into the stable.

“Louis, what’s wrong?” Harry reached for him and Louis jerked back as if he’d been pricked. Harry’s face changed from concerned to something unreadable. Louis couldn’t look at him, even when Harry begged him to tell him what was the matter, he’d only looked down at his muddy boots. Harry stomped away and when Louis went back to the front of the manor he was nowhere to be found.

Louis took some time before he had to go in and play host to calm his nerves, to shake that awful feeling while trying not to miss how it felt to have Harry holding him. 

_____________________

The rest of the week they skated around each other like scorned lovers, being masters at avoiding where the other would reside for the day. When Harry was in the gardens or floating in and out of the house Louis would go to the study, or if he was feeling a bit adventurous and a bit like a martyr the town square was where he’d spend the day. It wasn’t hard seeing as it made no difference to their parents whether or not if they were speaking. They didn’t know all the things that had been building up between them since Harry’s arrival, all the want, the soft touches, short glances, even the constant stares seemed innocent in their eyes. They’ve never seen them when they were alone with each other, and as far as they know the boys don’t even acknowledge the other's existence. 

But after a while Louis couldn’t take it anymore, he had grown used to Harry’s unusual humor and the way he could command a room with his presence. How small but important he’d make Louis feel when all of his attention was on him. He’d never felt that way before, much less with a man, so important and insignificant at the same time. 

And also because Lottie came to him to tell him how quite Harry has been for weeks, and that Louis better fix what he’s done to him before she tells their mother.

So after two weeks of silence, and with the coming knowledge of the Styles departure, Louis set out to find Harry and apologize so that things would be all right between them again. When he tried all he got back was a blank stare and a shrug. “It’s all right,” Harry said, leaning back onto the bench he was sitting at. Louis sat down next to him, determined to fix things.

“I’ve been…we’ve been distant lately.” Louis swallowed the lump in his throat. 

He could feel Harry’s eyes bore into the side of his head, but he wouldn’t turn to look. Harry scoffed, “You won’t even look me in the eyes, but you expect me to believe that you are sorry?”

Louis turned to look at him, but before he could say anything Harry got up and started walking towards the garden. He looked back expectantly, and suddenly they were walking through the garden in tandem with each other, shoulder to shoulder. Neither one of them saying a word.

“Harry.” He looked at him this time, really looked at him and took his hand and squeezed it to show that he meant it. It was the first move he made to touch Harry in the two months he’s been here. “I’m sorry for the way I’ve been acting and being so…weird with you.”

Harry hums, “How do I know this is genuine. One day we get along and then for weeks its silence. How do I know you won’t take everything back.”

Louis takes a deep breath, deciding that it’s time to lay himself bare, to stop holding himself back. “I’m scared of you. You know what you want in this life, and you go for it. And I’ve never had the pleasure to do what you do, and it makes me scared of you. I…” He takes another breath and holds his head up towards the heavens. “You make me want things and to take risks and it makes me scared.”

Harry groans, taking his hand away and sitting down on the fountain. Frustrated it seems, he scrubs a hand over his face. “Why does it makes you scared?” He demands, “Why are you so…frustrating!” He doesn’t say it to Louis but yells it behind closed eyes and a snarl.

“I…” He’s so scared to say what he feels but it can't hurt more than to try. So he just blurts it out, “I think I’m falling in love with you and I’m scared because I’ve never felt that way before.” 

“What?”

Louis looks at him, the sun setting just behind them and the sound of the water fountain hiding the way his heart is almost beating out of his chest. “You heard me,”

Harry stands, taking his place in front of Louis, sunset washing everything in a blue glow. Harry’s never looked prettier than he does with the knowledge that Louis loves him. “I…I’m falling in love with you too.” He takes Louis’ hand, leaning his forehead on his and connects their lips in a searing kiss. It’s slow, and when Louis was unsure of what to do, where to move next Harry fills in the gaps. They kissed as if it were their last moment together in this life as if a gust of wind would blow them into different directions. They kiss as if they are each other's last meal; Louis finding salvation between the folds of his tongue. 

The sound of the dinner bell ringing pulls them apart, they glance around to make sure no one saw and suddenly they’re thrown back into reality. Louis suddenly wishes this were one of the twin's fairytale stories where it always works out no matter what.

Louis pulls away even further. “We shouldn’t.”

Harry shakes his head and reaches for him, “Why? Tell me what’s the harm in wanting this?”

“Harry you know why. We’ve only known each other a few months and a few weeks what if…who even knows if it will last?” He hates to throw Harry’s words back at him but he needs him to understand.

“That…” Harry huffs, kissing Louis again. “I didn’t mean it. When I said that Louis I didn’t mean it I promise. I’m just as scared as you are.”

“But,”

Harry pulls away and cards a hand through his hair, the bells ring again more vigorously this time. “I’m fucking betrothed to someone. And if my father finds out about…he’ll ship me away to get fixed and then married. You don’t think I’m scared?” He laughs but it’s empty, “I’m trying to carve my only little piece for myself out of this world the same way you have. But I don’t want to play it safe, I want to _live_. Don’t you want to live?”

Louis squares his jaw, looking at the now lit up sunroom where he can see the shadows of everyone peeking through the curtains. “I…I was with another man before. .” He ignores the shocked look on Harry’s face and pushes on. “I was staying at my aunt's for the summer, one of my sisters is there now actually. And I had an affair with one of her business partners sons, it was lust not love but still, we had a short fling some odd years ago and his mother walked in on him inside of me.”

“Lou…”

“And she caused a big scene and told my mother. I’m never allowed to go back to her home, I’m not welcomed anymore. It’s why I don’t like to go to the town square unless I absolutely have to because the rumors, true as they are, they spread here and I get looks wherever I go and when I deny it only makes it worse. It’s why I’ve stayed home well into my twenties, and because I have to take care of my family, and I don’t want that for you, Harry.” 

“But I don’t give a damn what people think about me, Louis! I never cared when I dress how I want knowing that it makes my father's blood boil I still don’t give a damn! When I get looks all around town, because I get them too, I still don’t give a damn! When I almost got caught with a hand down some blokes pants in London I still didn’t give a damn.” He was closer now, pulling Louis in with each sentence, hands at the small of his back. “And even when I started to lose all hope, when I saw you walk through that door soaked and my first thought was how handsome you are I still didn’t give a damn. When I couldn’t keep my hands off of you, or couldn’t stop looking at you or following you around knowing it would make my parents angry I still didn’t give a damn.”

They kiss again, and it’s more loaded than the last one because Harry is holding his hip and Louis has his arms around his neck; holding on to each other like leeches. It’s heated, and somehow they topple over into the grass, practically hump each other against it. Louis against the ground and Harry straddling his waist, Louis’ hand traveling down to Harry's waist, holding it with his hands and squeezing every few seconds. Harry tries to slot his hand to reach between their stomachs but they’re separated again by a noise for what seems like the thousandth time.

“Bloody hell!”

They pull away in an instant, staring at Lottie from her place by the fountain. “Uhh…It’s not what it looks like Charlotte.” Louis says, trying to come up with some excuse as to why he had his tongue shoved down Harry’s mouth. 

She just smiled, a knowing look on her face instead of disgust.“It's all right, I’m not going to tell. But mother is getting a little antsy and she’s about to come out to try and find you two! So please compose yourself and come in before she has both your heads!”

She disappears and Louis turns to Harry, “Do we look too disheveled?”

From the little light that was shining, he could tell that Harry’s entire face was blotchy, and if he looked like that then Louis surely looked even worse. 

“Let’s just say we got lost and had to run back. It’ll explain why we look like we were doing_ …other _ things.”

Louis nods at the plan, giving Harry one more kiss before they go in through the kitchen, saying hello to a few servants. All eyes are on them the moment they enter, his mother coming towards them and grabbing his face turning it every which way.

“What happened to you too?” She does the same to Harry, eyes looking between them. “Why are you all messy and out of breath?”

Harry turned to Louis, eyes wide while Louis blurted out. “We got lost trying to come back home. We heard the supper bell and ran to get here on time. Uh…sorry?”

“Oh,” she fussed with his collar, frowning. “It’s unlike you to get lost. You know these lands like the back of your hand.”

Harry jumped in, “We didn’t go out on your lands we... we went uhh…really far away. Past the tree lines.”

Anne shook her head, patting the seat next to her. “Well, it’s too late for you both to freshen up so you might as well just sit an eat. But no more going past those tree lines or staying out so late. It’s much too dangerous”

Des belched, “Yeah, don’t need you getting yourself ill before you leave in two days.”

“What?” Louis could feel all the color drain from his face.

Des looks to Anne, before saying harshly, “He’s leaving in two days to spend the rest of autumn with his betrothed, Madeline.” When he looks at Louis there’s something unreadable in his eyes, and for a split second Louis thinks he knows, because he’s looking at him with contempt. A deep frown on his face wanting for Louis to challenge his words like he really wants to say: _ I'm sending him away to you from each other_.

Harry scoffed, throwing down his napkin. “You never told me this?”

Anne, being the peacemaker, grabbed his bicep to calm the boy down but Harry snatched his arm away, causing his father to grab him with a tight grip. “You will do as I say. You’ll be getting married next year, don’t you think it’s wise to spend a little time with your future _ wife _?”

Harry banged his fist on the table. “You always do this! Think that you can control my life and how I should live it.”

“You watch your tone with me!” Des grabbed Harry by the back of his neck, turning his face towards him. Everyone was silent. “You will do as I say or else.”

Harry doesn’t say a word, doesn’t move until Des lets go of the harsh grip on his neck, only then does he nod. But the look he gives Des after he lets go says it all, but he doesn’t say anything, and neither does Louis. 

And when he tried to get the boy to look at him, placing his foot on top of his Harry couldn’t meet his eyes, only pulled his foot away and stabbed his vegetables. They both don’t speak for the rest of supper, Louis feigns fatigue when they decide to take the rest of tonight to the parlor room. Collapsing on his bed he lets out a muffled scream, damning everything that he could think of, voice hoarse by the time he’d finish. He lets out a humorless laugh, of course, things go to shit just as everything seemed to mend itself.

It seemed like hours passed, the cold night air blowing steady breezes into his room, makes him shiver but he doesn’t move. All he can think about is how Harry will be gone, out of his life just as fast as Louis came into his. The sound of his door opening doesn’t even startle him, even when Harry landed next to him and started to kiss his face. Louis couldn’t bear it, pulling away and curling in on himself.

“Lou,” Harry pleaded. “Please look at me.”

“There’s no point in doing this, Harry. You’re just going to be leaving in two days anyways.”

Harry hugged him from behind, kissing the back of his neck and making Louis feel safer in his arms then he has his whole life. “I’m not going,”

“What are you talking about Harry?”

Harry just pulled him closer. “I’m not going. We’re going to go somewhere far from here.”

Louis stilled, sitting up and turning to face the younger boy, wanting the know what the hell he was talking about. “Did you bump your head on your way to my room? What the hell are you talking about?”

Harry grabbed Louis’ hand and start to trace patterns into his palm. “As I said,” he looked up at Louis, “I’m not going anywhere without you, and we’re going to get out of here.”

Louis cursed whatever God there was above for having him fall in love with an idiot. “Harry where the hell are we going to go?” He shivered when Harry traced a heart into his palm. “We…I can’t just leave my family!”

It was Harry’s turn to sit up now, staring at him confused. “Why?” he questioned. “Why don’t you want to be a little selfish and do something you want to do for once? Your family is going to be just okay without you, Louis.”

Louis frowned, “You don’t know that. They already barely let my mother collect the rent on the land we rent out because she’s a woman. If I’m not here to show a male presence they’re just going to walk all over her and won’t pay on time or at all. It’s ridiculous but that’s just the way it is.”

“I…I didn’t know that’s why you stayed even after you became of age to leave.”

Louis shrugs, “I’m all my mother has, and she leans on me a lot for support and to help around with making sure whom we loan out land to pay their dues. As well as help with the girls.”

Harry doesn’t say anything for a long time, seemingly thinking over how to convince Louis to run away with him, but Louis couldn’t take that chance knowing all the responsibilities he had.

“I don’t…Louis, I don’t want to marry Madeline. I’d rather die than to become like that story I made up weeks ago.”

“Wait!” Louis says, carding a hand through Harry’s mop of curls, “You made that up? You wanker!” He lunges for Harry, digging his fingers into his side and causing a short burst of laughter to fall from his pretty bitten lips. Straddling his waist and only letting up when Harry said if he didn’t stop soon he’d piss himself. They stare at each other for a moment, Louis drinking in all the ways Harry makes him happy, and how he looks under him panting and flushed with his mouth agape. If only they could stay like this for all forever. 

Louis gets off a moment later, shaking his hair out and trying not to adjust himself in his trousers.

“Runaway with me, we’ll live in the city if you’d like.”

Louis rolls his eyes, “Harry-”

“Or we can find a pretty cottage to rent and live there. I just want to be with you Louis, and we can’t be together unless we just go.” 

Louis thinks it over some, he’d love to be with Harry with no judgment, but he knows where ever they go they’ll always face judgment. He tells Harry as such and watches the shadows of the trees dance across Harry’s face.

“Life’s not living if it’s not worth the risk. So jump with me, or I will cease to exist in your world in the coming days.” He says it with so much finality that Louis is left breathless, but he’s right. And all Louis can think about is Charlotte, and his mother, and the land, and the place he’s called home for all twenty-four years of his life. These walls that he’s grown accustomed to, played with playmates, had birthdays in, saw the birth of all of his sisters, the death of his father. Was he ready to give this up for…for love?

All of his life Louis had played it safe, not stepping out of bounds and always doing what was expected of him no matter how much he didn’t want to. And when he decided to take a leap and indulge in his pleasure all those years ago and it turned to hell he decided that he would never leap like that again. But this was different, this was running away to be with the one he loved, to be free of all the rules they had to follow. To choose their destiny. What would he pick? A lifetime in solitude or something so good, so precious and as simple as _ love_? 

He looked at Harry, watched as his eyes closed in content like he already knew the question to the battle Louis was having in his head. A sugary smile on his face and his dimples popping as his grin turned into something more. He opened his eyes and Louis had already made his choice weeks ago, it just took him some time to get there, because he never really stood a chance. And in the end, he picked Harry, and he’d pick him a thousand times in every lifetime, for all eternity and in every possible universe.

_____________________

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! 
> 
> [Here is the link the edit I made!](https://leedsau.tumblr.com/post/187401512481/i-took-my-love-take-it-down-by-aiienharry-11k)


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